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Don't Feel Like Dancing

by ochrence

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about

A reflection on recovery after loss and the healing power of human connection.

lyrics

Been a year since she's been gone
And five months since she left
I spend my time collecting dust
Tell them all I need more rest
Meditation, exercise
Cold showers, my friends patronize
But love cannot be synthesized
And I can't take more of this
Let's say I came to your party
With a smile upon my face
And we danced through half the streets
This side of town
I'd still end the night alone in bed
With the same cruel thoughts
And the same old dread
But you put your finger to your lips
And grab my hand

I swear I thought I told you that
I just don't feel like dancing much tonight
You say nobody's watching us anyway
And I'll admit you have a point
But I don't feel like dancing much tonight
Though if I've got a problem, it's much too late
So for this one song, I think I'll stay
Okay, I'll stay
I guess

I take two clumsy steps
Then lock into the groove
"It's been so long," I stammer out
But then, what do I have to prove
A twist, a spin, I catch your dive
And I am slowly hypnotized
By how our bodies intertwine
And tear across the floor
And it dawns on me slowly
There's a smile upon my face
And I can't shake it off
No matter how hard I try
(No matter how hard I try)
The music fades, I meet your eyes
"Guess that's the song," you start to sigh
I shake my head, say not so fast
Just take my hand

I can't believe I told you that
I just don't feel like dancing much tonight
'Cause nobody's watching us anyway
We're just getting started
And while I did not feel like dancing much tonight
The music is pushing the pain away
It's still going strong, why don't we stay

I may not make it home tonight
You never know
For once I'm doing what feels right
It's time to let go
I've found a place to call my home
(Can't wait for love that never comes)
I'll build a life to call my own
(From someone who chooses to be numb)
We may not make it home tonight
For all we know
For once we're choosing what feels right
And letting go
I have found a place to call my home
I will build a life to call my own
I have found a place to call my home
Within your arms

credits

released February 2, 2024
Song written, performed, produced, and mixed by Ethan Craigo; mastered by Will Kennedy. Cover photograph captured by Grace Li and edited by Ethan Craigo. Thank you both so much, Will and Grace!

Thanks to my kind friends and family for listening and providing encouragement, support, and advice, including (but certainly not limited to): Lucas Wood, Jared Orentlich, Olivia Erickson, Noah Gold, John Craigo, Vaibhav Mohanty, Anna Sappington, Alasdair Mackenzie, Ezra Sassaman, Maya Caines, David Anderson, Nick Krebs, Sarah Hladíková, the Dins (as always), Sierra Violet, and Sasha Yakub. I seriously would not have gotten this song finished without all of you.

(And thanks to the Lompoc Café's summer dance parties in 2023 for general inspiration.)

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all rights reserved

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about

ochrence Boston, Massachusetts

I'm a vocalist and electronic music producer raised in Maine and currently based in Boston. This is my wonky synthpop project.

For more experimental stuff look here: ethancraigo.bandcamp.com.

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